Rogaine in the Membrane

"You guys have pop?"

"AKA soda. Yes."

"Sop."

"Poda."

"Poda, Yoda's younger brother."

"He speaks perfect English."

" 'A good Jedi you will never make,' a young Yoda would taunt."

" 'That's alright, I'm a grammarian,' Poda would reply."

"Poda the short, green grammarian."

"That movie would be dumber than a garlic breathmint."

"Are you kidding? It would rock more than an obsidian rocking chair. He's short. He's green. He teaches elementary students about verbs and nouns."

"And you should see the size of his q-tips. He uses lint rollers."

"Paintbrushes."

"Bunches of cottonballs on the end of a mop."

"Or just one really big cotton ball."

"A sheep on the end of a mop."