Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Let loose the Pylons of War

"Oh man I know nothing about the history final."

"Yeah me neither. I don't know whether Pylos is person or a place or an animal or vegetable or mineral."

"Yeah, all I can think of when I hear that word is a traffic cone."

"Pylon was very middle-of-the-road on this issue."

"Pylos was a major thoroughfare for Greek trade."

"However, they were forced to take a detour around it."

"Darn rubberneckers."

Friday, December 4, 2009

Snowing Parmesan Cheese

"What do you call a cheese popsicle?"

"Freezy cheese!"

"What do you call someone else's cheese popsicle?"

"Nacho Popsicle!"

Thursday, November 12, 2009

Kosher Kittens?

"Every time I see orange juice I think 'orange Jews'"

"Every time someone says in biology, "Cat juice," I get the image of a cat saying 'meowzel tov'"

Sunday, November 8, 2009

They look kinda like fish

So. Jon and I decided it would be a good idea to put goolgy eyes on our shoes. Tyler pointed out some potential drawbacks. But we pressed on.

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Rush Limbaugh

"You can make a potato burger as long as you have three potatoes and thumbs."

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"That's a hokey folky pokey."

Refuse to Diffuse

"Life is like a water balloon. If you fill it too full, it explodes."

"Marriage is like dynamite. It only takes one match."

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“Caleb! Your beard is gone! It looks nice. It's hibernating inside your face.”

“And in the spring it will come out again.”

“With little flowerbuds on the end of the hairs.”

Monday, November 2, 2009

Dragged Over the Rusty Keyboard of Your Heart

"If your heart goes 'lush dush' there's something wrong with your valves."

"Sounds like something out of a romance novel."

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"Whoa I just dragged my book over my keyboard and something came up. So I couldn't do it any more. I was otherwise engaged."

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"Skittles--they come from Steve."

"I want to make a short film about that. I'd still appreciate it in 50 years."

"The good old days. When skittles came from Steve and water was free."

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"Every time I see the phrase 'naval power' it makes me happy inside."

"In 1913 Churchill had proposed a navel holiday."