Blindosaurs

"Ding da ding da ding da ding! Well today Christian told me something cool. Ding da ding da ding da ding! Something about dinosaurs. Ding da ding da ding da ding! Apparently, they have a little something called brain knobs; Ding da ding da ding da ding! These little bundles of nerves (a good band name I imagine); Ding da ding da ding da ding! Are located in the knees of dinosaurs: Ding da ding da ding da ding! And they, essentially, are reseivoirs of reaction, Ding da ding da ding da ding!"

"Stoked about that ukelele aren't ya?"

"Yeah! But isn't that weird? Like, what if your brain was in your knees? Or you had multiple brains?"

"You could get a stroke in your left knee. Then your left knee would be really stupid."

"You could get punched in the face and just stand there for a few seconds wondering what just happened."

"But I imagine you'd be pretty good at soccer."

"Dude, your eyes are in your face."

"Yeah but your feet are on your feet."

"Your brain being near your feet would only help blind soccer players... playing with other blind soccer players."

"There would be no end to the carnage."

Flip Flop Flip

"What do you call flip flops for a person with two left feet?"

"Flip flips?"

"No, flop flops. Flip flips are for people with two right feet. Right feet are more dextrous. If you have two left feet you're more likely to flop."

Let's roll like a stone that gathers no moss.

"Man I used to be so short."

"Me too. I used to be all heights. Including 90 feet. They used to call me Paul Bunyan."

"I used to have 90 feet. They called me Tentacles. I used to tell people I was going to go for a run, and they'd say, 'good luck.'"

"I'm going to go for a crawl instead."