Spuperman

"You look kind of like Clark Kent with those glasses on. Or maybe Peter Parker. I'm not sure which."

"Those are my alter egos. Sometimes I am Clark Kent; sometimes Peter Parker. I am Alter Ego Man!"

"Y'know, there's probably someone else out there who goes around as Spiderman."

"When disaster strikes, I enter a telephone booth as Spiderman, and emerge as Superman!"

"How do you do that?!"

"I'm like one of those plastic Easter eggs. Half of me is pink and the other half green."

"You're a Siamese twin?"

"Ha what if Spiderman and Superman were Siamese twins?"

"Only their legs would be allergic to kryptonite."

She's Dangerous

"Y'know, I've always wanted to do Jeopardy."

"That would be cool. I wonder if there's anyone named Jeopardy."

"I would have lots of respect for them if there was."

"And if they were siamese twins, you could call them Double Jeopardy."

"Pretty much anyone at NSA could do Jeopardy. Claire would own Jeopardy."

"Yeah but Claire is Canadian."

"It would suck to win a gameshow like Who Wants To Be A Millionaire in a different country. Like Mexico. It's like, 1000 pesos to a dollar."

"Ole! I win! I get a free beer!"