We Don't Know Enough About Peter Parker

"What do you call a heroic, creepy, web-slinging valet wearing red tights at a Greek restaurant in New York City?"

"Pita Parker."

Spuperman

"You look kind of like Clark Kent with those glasses on. Or maybe Peter Parker. I'm not sure which."

"Those are my alter egos. Sometimes I am Clark Kent; sometimes Peter Parker. I am Alter Ego Man!"

"Y'know, there's probably someone else out there who goes around as Spiderman."

"When disaster strikes, I enter a telephone booth as Spiderman, and emerge as Superman!"

"How do you do that?!"

"I'm like one of those plastic Easter eggs. Half of me is pink and the other half green."

"You're a Siamese twin?"

"Ha what if Spiderman and Superman were Siamese twins?"

"Only their legs would be allergic to kryptonite."